I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
