Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
