Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
