my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Randomize
