she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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