Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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