Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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