Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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