would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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