Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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