We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
this is an emotional support booty call
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