I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
