Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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