I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
my being single is dangerous.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
The feeling are messing with the penis
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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