Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
