Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
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I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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