Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
