You can't special order awesome
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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