so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
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We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
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Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
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