ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize