no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
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