I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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