after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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