the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
