Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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