I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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