We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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