Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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