I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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