weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize