We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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