After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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