She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Damn victory sex feels great
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
