Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
