it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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