I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
