if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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