she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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