How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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