she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
