I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
