i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize