I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
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Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
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Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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