If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
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