I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
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i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
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I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
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