careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize