is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize