SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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