you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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