Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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